Pros: I love Mortal Kombat. It goes without saying. I am an ambassador for MK. An apologist to the point where if the franchise delivers another...

Cons: I still find the character models to be extremely corny. 3D just hasn't done this franchise well at all, and I don't believe that's the 90s...

Pros: I love Mortal Kombat. It goes without saying. I am an ambassador for MK. An apologist to the point where if the franchise delivers another flop its not just embarrassing for me, but my whole family as well. This is the guy that played MK Mythologies for the story.... Yea that's right, for the story. That's like watching two-girls one-cup because you like the music. That's why I am happy to say that this self titled Mortal Kombat remake (of sorts) has brought honor back to my family name!

Lets start off with presentation. I'll preface this review a bit by saying that MK lost a huge chunk of its soul in the transition from 2D digitized graphics to the 3D template. Fortunate for this installment the designers have abandoned some of the cornier costume alternations to classic characters like we've seen in Deception and Armageddon and have gone with a more orthodox, shall i say Klassic (..*sigh*) approach to the character designs. I was happy to see that there are an incredible amount of stages, and a lot of them are absolutely Jawesome ("awesome" for you that speak Street-Shark). I'm talkin' Dragons flying around battered looking cityscapes and green spirit tornadoes. All that fun stuff we all love. There are a ton of favorite stages from the likes of MK one through three revamped, reinvented and re-appreciated.

The game-play is also solid as three granite statue dicks. Ok maybe not that solid. But its pretty fun. The combo system is easy to learn and somewhat hard to master. The X-Ray attack is a nice addition, even though it feels a tad gimmicky and decides matches way too often. The 2D fighting format makes me wonder why they ever decided to go 3D in the first place. would you believe I don't miss sidestepping at all? All the classic special moves are represented, spears and ice and all that shit. The game-play is suitable for both button mashing douche-bags and Cobra Kai elites who work the sticks like ballerinas.

The Fatalities are trying really hard to be as fucked-up as possible, which is appreciated. A lot of them (check Scorpions head-splitting sword fatality) have a very cool cinematic aesthetic too them complete with slow-motion and camera angels that would put your USC film school student to shame. The effort is much appreciated. It still feels amazing to perform a gruesome fatality on n00bish friends and or friends you secretly hate. that one goes out to all you passive aggressive types out there.

The story mode is also entertaining and worth playing through. A lot of it feels like it was picked straight out of The Octogan only with worse acting, which should say it all. On a positive note, the voice acting is pretty much as bad as the dialogue making it feel balanced. it's kind of cool to see the origins of Kabal and other characters play out in cinematic form like that. It does run a little long, and drags a bit in certain places, but it familiarizes you with a lot of the main characters and the ending is interesting enough. (lite spoilers) To give you an idea, they kill off more main characters than X-men 3.

Proves NetherRealm games really does have some taint.

This game is definitely worth checking out if your a fighting game fan and or hardcore, blind-loyal, stupid as fuck MK fan like myself. The challenge tower will provide some extra fun with a mini-game like spin on the standard game-play. You can nerdgasm your way through the Krypt and spend all those hard earned shekels you made slaying your opponents on alternate fatalities, additional costumes, concept art, and other things that will never get looked at again. Online play will provide some serious replay value and help build your MK chops all while providing you with hours away from family and friends. It's absolutely a good time that deserves recommendation.

Cons: I still find the character models to be extremely corny. 3D just hasn't done this franchise well at all, and I don't believe that's the 90s purist in me talking. I don't know whose real life **** these artistic designers are basing the **** on the female characters in this game on, but it makes me utter worlds that 12 year old me would beat my ass for saying: "those ******* are too big".

Which leads me into my main criticism.

Mortal Kombat used to be cutting edge, right? It used to pave its own way and, love it or hate it, it was ahead of its time. Who doesn't remember the controversy surrounding all the violence and watching congressmen give MK shout-outs on C-SPAN, attributing it to the decay western civilization and violence in schools. Remember when games wanted to be like Mortal Kombat (see: Killer Instinct)? Those were the days. Now all that the Mortal Kombat team seems to be doing is taking orders from the success of other games in the genre. It's gone back to well, much like Street fighter 4, the **** are huge and stupid looking like in Soul Caliber. It seems like Mortal Kombat has become increasingly self aware. Coming off of Mortal Kombat vs. DC and the loss of face for releasing it without the staple Mature rating lead to the creation of this game. Back to the well. And much like your newly wed friend who pushes to go to the strip club in a corny and desperate attempt to prove his wife doesn't call all the shots, this game tries too hard to prove itself and looses its sincerity in the process (yes, I'm still talking about a video-game). While this sort of weird meditation on the franchise shouldn't be what pushes you to like or not like this game. its something to think about.

That being said the game is still fun and provides plenty of replay value. The book ends aren't bad either.